How to Assign Targets in Assassins

If you are hosting or playing in an assassins game, it is important to know how targets are assigned. On Sassins.com you can assign initial targets in any arbitrary way you want, but we make it very easy to do it in a circle, like this:



Each dot represents a player and each arrow represents an assigned target, pointing from assassin to target.

When a kill occurs, the person who got eliminated is removed from the circle, and her assassin is then assigned to target her former target. (A→B→C becomes A→C when B is eliminated.)

This algorithm ensures that each player always has exactly one target and one assassin until there is only one player surviving.

This knowledge would have been valuable to 'Dispatcher'...

'John Galt' killed 'Dispatcher'

'Dispatcher' writes,
Tuesday Afternoon, the future looks bright. My would-be assassin coyly requests help with MATLAB programming. A third party assassin dispatches my assailant minutes before he could execute his vile plan. Believing I was safe (since I didn't know who was after me), I let my two colleagues finish their business after they asked to be left alone. Seconds after I left, the killer chased me down and made small talk. Like an innocent one-winged dove I fell for the bait and let my guard down. After positioning me against the wall, the cruel villain exacted her second kill in 2 minutes as I fell to the ground. For my last moments I thought about how precious life really is.


Originally published on Tuesday, March 28, 2006, in the game HKN Assassins Spring '06

'John Galt' went on to get a total of three kills. She was eliminated in the end, but she had the most kills so she won the game.

A Cup to the Head

Hey everyone. Sorry for the recent dearth in posts. If I don't post every Thursday, you should scold me in the comments.

Some rules of assassins games allow messy weapons, such as water. Using messy weapons can be risky, but it generates some entertaining stories...

'lethal intimidation' killed 'whistle blower'

'lethal intimidation' writes,
Cristi swore up and down that I was her attacker. I successfully deceived her into thinking it wasn't me. I lied and cheated my way into successfully getting invited to her apartment. She pretended to kill me, and in "self-defense" I grabbed a cup of water. While her back was turned at the computer, I dumped my cup of water on her head and assassinated her. She never saw it coming!

'whistle blower' writes,
My assassin slyly coerced herself into my apartment, and then while I was on the computer, poured a cup of water on my back!!


Originally published on Friday, March 24, 2006, in the game North Georgia College Assassins

After dumping a cup of water on the head of her computer-using friend, 'lethal intimidation' went on to get a total of 6 kills! She was killed so she didn't win the game, but she did have the most kills.

Poetry

As I've said before, when you're playing an assassins game that has a good game history page, you can express your creativity in the form of kill reports. Today's featured story has two well-written kill reports, and one that even has a poem. It also demonstrates the value of playing an assassins game in a community of people that already know each other somewhat, because it helped the assassin find her target.

'stealthy swansonite' killed 'kill-shot'

'stealthy swansonite' writes,
I was fashioning a terracotta pot when I observed the target slinking around sipping at a root beer float... he looked sneaky, but I'm sneakier. So I followed him up through the KFC... he stopped to check out the baseball players for a while (err... a LONG time) and I waited patiently behind a pillar. In the brief moments between the doors of the KFC and Swanson I stunned him with the hit! Booyah!

'kill-shot' writes,
So I'm walking from the Library to the Bookstore, minding my own business, when I see Ice Cream. Naturally, I stop to grab a bite, and it was this time that I ran into one 'stealthy swansonite'. She said hello and tried to coerce me into making a pot with her. In reality, she was plotting to keep me in her sight until she could stick me. Anyway, I leave to go to the bookstore. On my way out, I happen to come across the baseball team, practicing in the gym. I scanned the players to see if I could spot [my friend] (a fellow SBST'er). I didn't, so I resumed my journey to the bookstore. It was as I was crossing the middle-ground between Skutt and Swanson that my worst fears were realized. [My assassin] ran up to me and did a very not nice thing. She stuck me with that stupid green sticker.

And here are my dying words:

Oh [assassin], noble [assassin]
You stuck upon me my death,
In the form of green ice.
--so cold
--so ruthless
May the good knight avenge my death
Either in this life or the next

Originally published on Wednesday, March 22, 2006, in the game Creighton Paranoia Spring 2006

'stealthy swansonite' achieved 4 kills total before dying.

Do you have any poems or writings about assassins you would like to share? Leave a comment on this blog.

Ouch!

Ouch... sometimes assassins games have unintended consequences. It can be a very exciting game, but please keep your own safety in mind as you pursue your target. There's no reason to get 23 stitches, like 'Lord Raiku'...

'Lord Raiku' killed 'Nemo'

'Lord Raiku' writes,
After unsuccessfully staking out my hapless target six times in the last 2 days, the elusive 'Nemo' finally lies dead. In accomplishing this great feat I risked life and limb in the most literal sense of the word. My fruitful endeavors cost me the literal exposure of my bicep muscle and I have 23 stitches to show for it.

After spying on my target throughout dinner (which was a nice roast beef and potato affair), I realized that he was about to make a break for it. I made like lightning and bolted out of my seat and darted after his running person. I pursued him across the lush grass that separates the safety of his dorm and the neutral territory that is the cafe, nearing him with every stride. Finally, I was in range. I gave my weapon a mighty squeeze, beaming an arch of water at his back. Again I fired. I realized he was nearing safety, as he approached the TWUSA office.

I don't know what happened next. I slipped on the confounded mud, but staying upright, I shot my target and promptly smashed right through the glass window with my outstretched right arm. The glass sliced my upper arm, exposing my muscle to the open air, heavy with mustard gas (alright, the mustard gas is a lie). I stared at my wound, in utter shock, but, arranging my priorities, I confirmed that I had killed my target. The response was affirmative. I realized it was now appropriate to collapse on the ground. I collapsed on the ground. I hyperventilated. I was rushed to the hospital and 23 stitches later I'm fully repaired and back in the game. Watch out, Ketchum's about.

'Nemo' writes,
Well... I will let him tell the story if he wants, but he definitely earned this kill! No doubt about it...


Originally published on Friday, March 17, 2006, in the game Mission Ops Spring '06

This was Lord Raiku's second and final kill. He was alive when the game ended.

Entertaining Kill Reports

When you're playing an assassins game that has a good game history page, you get to write kill reports for all the other players in the game to see. Indeed, part of the fun of playing assassins is writing entertaining kill reports. I was entertained by this one when I saw it:

'Lord Raiku' killed 'Vinny the Fish'

'Lord Raiku' writes,
It was a sneaky kill. I deceived the target into trusting me. I chased him and shot him in the torso, and blood spilled all over the sidewalk, forming the letters "MISTRUST" on the pathway.

'Vinny the Fish' writes,
It all started as an ordinary day. The paranoia, the jumping at shadows, and the running from black cats. A little after noon I was eating my lunch in the cafeteria. As I finished my meal, I took my refuse to the trash bin as usual. As I was preparing to leave the cafeteria, one of my trusted associates initiated a conversation with me. I, trusting the fellow, bid him farewell and headed off for my next engagement.

As I stepped out of the cafeteria, I could feel the weight of doom pressing down heavily on my back, and from behind me came a mighty war cry, as if all the mountains of the earth were being crushed with one herculean explosion of sound. I turned, fearing for my life, and beheld my doom approaching. Defenseless, I ran with all of my strength, but I had only taken half a dozen steps when the traitor's shot caught me on my leg. Falling to the ground. I stared blearily through a haze of pain as my attacker moved in to finish me off. Just before dealing the final blow, he spoke the words, "pancakes," then shot me in the solar plexus. As the world faded to black, all I could think was, "Why pancakes?"


Originally published on Tuesday, March 14, 2006, in the game Mission Ops Spring '06

'Lord Raiku' finished the game alive with two kills.

Patience is a virtue but Relctuance and Procrastination are faults

In assassins games, Patience is a virtue, but Reluctance and Procrastination can be faults. Deadly faults. Especially when your target and assassin both eat at the same dormitory cafeteria as you...

'Phenomenal Woman' killed 'Crazy Squirrel'

'Phenomenal Woman' writes,
Well I was eating dinner, you know. They had fried chicken and it was good. So I was waiting forever, watching the door, just waiting for Amanda to come in. So I gave up looking for her and started to watch for others trying to kill me. Just when I was putting my tray up, she walked in. So I followed her to the chicken line and graciously sat the dot* on her shoulder. Yup, that's how my first target went down. Isn't it exciting.

* In this assassins game, they chose to use dot-shaped stickers as the only allowable weapon.

'Crazy Squirrel' writes,
Well, I was walking to dinner all paranoid. Just waiting...I get to the dining hall and think, "Is the dining hall safe?" I see my target going to sit down and wonder whether or not I should get her now. I decide on later. I see 'Phenomenal Woman' walking out the door and since we always smile at each other, I smiled at her, didn't think anything of it, and got into line for food where I see that it's fried chicken and the end of the macaroni, so I was silently complaining about not getting a lot of cheese with my macaroni. I was a little mad, I like cheese. I'm leaning against the wall when all of a sudden I feel a pressure on my shoulder, I turn around and there is 'Phenomenal Woman' who informs me I was her target.

Originally published on Wednesday, March 01, 2006, in the game Wesleyan Dots Spring '06

'Phenomenal Woman' woman died two days later outside the art building. This was her only kill.

Patience is a Virtue

In this blog, you have read about many elaborate, lucky, or fancy ways of eliminating your target. But sometimes the best strategy is to simply wait outside your target's residence, especially if you target lives in a dormitory. This tactic requires patience, but it gets the job done. Let 'Polly Nomial' tell you all about it...

'Polly Nomial' killed 'Custard Cup'

'Polly Nomial' writes,
No info, no sightings, no kills, nothing. With Slaughter of the Innocents* looming near, something drastic had to be done. Something.... lethal. My accomplice and I stalked his [dormitory] floor, dodging resident and RA alike, all apathetic to our loitering presence. As we drew close to his lair, a light burned from within to signal his presence. Alas, he was protected by the conventions of invitation**. So I waited. And waited. And got a drink of water. And waited. My accomplice standing guard, we saw the light go out, the door shut. I had lost my chance. Or had I... my oblivious prey left his room and walked right toward us, equally unconcerned about the presence of awkwardly placed strangers - "Hey... Kurt? I know you! You're Kurt! I'm... I'm terribly sorry..." swift spoon to the gut, "...you're dead."

Originally published on Tuesday, February 14, 2006, in the game Campus-Wide Spring '06

*Slaughter of the Innocents: A day on which all players in the game who have no kills were scheduled to be removed.

**Conventions of Invitiation: Standard assassins rules state that a player's living space is a safe zone where he can not be assassinated, unless he invites his assassin in.

'Polly Nomial' went on to get second place in the game, with two kills.